In this piece, the author uses two metaphorical chairs to describe the emotional battle between comfort and vulnerability while dealing with depression. The first chair, comfort, symbolizes a safe, familiar place of emotional retreat, where the individual feels temporarily at ease but never fully healed. The second chair, vulnerability and faith, represents the harder path, one that requires stepping into discomfort in order to seek true healing, despite the fear and uncertainty it brings.
The author’s personal journey with depression began during high school when feelings of belonging were quickly replaced by abandonment. College brought attempts at finding fulfillment through partying, but this only led to more emptiness. Eventually, a decision was made to journey with God, which surfaced deeper feelings of abandonment and pain. Seeking counseling became the next step, and with hands shaking, the author began to explore the layers of their depression.
Through this process, the author reflects on how Scripture speaks to the struggles of depression. Passages like Isaiah 9:6 and Matthew 5:4 emphasize that God understands the pain and mourning, and Jesus’ own grief is shown in passages like John 11:35 and Matthew 26:38. The author learns that God not only comforts in the midst of pain, but also calls us to faith, where healing comes through vulnerability, even when it feels like a choice between staying in a painful but familiar place or taking the difficult step of trusting God with our wounds.
Choosing faith over comfort is compared to a physical injury that requires surgery for true healing, even though it hurts. The author admits that, at first, they chose the comfort of sadness, not wanting to let go of the chair of familiarity, but through God’s work in their life, they see how Jesus endured suffering not because He deserved it, but because He desired to heal them and lead them from death to life.
The key takeaway is that true healing from depression requires choosing vulnerability and faith, even when it feels like an overwhelming challenge. God, as the Wonderful Counselor, sits beside us through this process, offering comfort while guiding us toward deeper healing.
